Jedi vs Xenomorphs vs Predators vs Yuushan Vong

[Airlocke_Jedi_Knight]

Carasone is a mostly barren world, rich in rare and valuable metals, and home of a very bizarre form of sentient life. The only other thing of note is a New Republic Research facility. The facility is of significant size, it has its own research labs, food processing labs, and mineral conversion labs. It is millions of square feet, and is operated mostly with droids. There is a team of 300 scientists who live there. One day, a strange ship crashes about 2 km away from the facility. A team of five people are sent to investigate. They find the crew dead, and several weird looking cacoons in the cargo hold. They take the crew and cocoons back to the ship. each of the dead crewman have developing xenomorphs inside. I think we all know what the cocoons are. About five xenomorphs survived the crash and follow the scientists back to the base. We all know what happens from there. New xenomorphs are born, many scientists die, and the xenomorphs breed like crazy. A distress signal is sent out.

The Jedi Order receives the signal, and is greatly unnerved by its contents. Despite the war they are currently fighting in, they cannot ignore it. A team of ten jedi and 50 New Republic commandos are sent to evacuate any remaining survivors and to gather any possible data on the weird aliens that they can. The team is made up of Luke Skywalker, Leia Solo, Cilghal(healer and scientist, not an offensive minded Jedi, though she is a master), Cilghal's assistant Tekli, Anakin Solo, Jaina Solo, Jason Solo, Danni Quee(Force sensitive scientist. Good with a blaster. Not incredible with the Force), Corran Horn, and Tahiri Veila. Han Solo comes along for the ride, of course. Keyan Farlander leads the Jedi team. Everyone on the commando team is equipped vacuum capable battle armor. The Jedi and Solo with flex suits that are suitable for a vacuum and very lightly armored. They are light and flexible.

The distress signal is also caught by a predator cleaning team. Such a large infestation cannot be ignored. There are 5 hardcore Predators here, with full equipment.

The Yuuzhan Vong also pick up the distress signal. They send in a team of twenty warriors.

The Jedi bring a Lancer-class frigate. The Yuuzhan Vong a corvette analog. The Predators are in something similar to a patrol boat.

The Jedi win if they can evacuate any survivors, take minimum casualties, get some data on the xenomorphs and Preds, and get the fuck out.

The Preds win if they kill all of the xenomorphs. They care nothing for the Jedi or Yuuzhan Vong for the moment, though, that may change after they see them in action.

The Yuuzhan Vong want to kill the Jeedai, capture a few Xenomorphs, and kill the Predators. They have normal Vonduun Crab armor, with Amphistaffs, thud and razorbugs, and yorik coral knives.


So, what happens here? Who accomplishes their goals?

[Praeothmin]

Seriously though, you stacked the deck so much in the Jedi's favor, they will clearly win.
You brought the most powerful Force users of the New Jedi order... PLUS the absolute fucking Master, Luke Skywalker.
PLUS 50 Commandoes, and they are all garbed in super tough armor.

The 5 Super Preds and 20 Vong warriors don't stand a chance.

While the Jedi can provide some sort of Force "sensor" cover, the Commandoes can spend all their time looking for trouble, clues to the survivors' whereabouts, etc...
The Jedi would sense the Vong's "absence" in the Force, and when the Preds finally make themselves known, Jedi "combat sense" (I don't use "precog" because it clearly isn't true precognition) will help in fighting off the others.
With the Jedi next to them, the Commandoes are far more courageous then they would nromally be, and won't break rank or get frightened as easily, meaning we have an effective, bad ass fighting force of 50 men covering the Jedi.

The Vong, while being able to do much against the Xenos, would still suffer greatly.
While their weapons could protect them from Preds, every Xeno they killed would spill acid on them, and I doubt even their Crab armor would survive an acid that eats through anything except some Pred weapons...

[Mike DiCenso]

One thing is for certain, no matter who wins in this free-for-all match up, everyone will take some pretty serious casualties all around.
-Mike

[Airlocke_Jedi_Knight]

I pretty much agree with Praeothmin, though I didn't want to admit it. I didn't realize that the match up was so lopsided. I mean, I thought the Jedi would take it, but I am a Jedi wanker, I thought there would be some argument. Some debate. Well, anyway, the Jedi win.

[Mike DiCenso]

You need a group of generic Jedi. Either that or you need to increase the size of the Predator, Xeno, and Vong forces to compensate, or both.
-Mike

[Mr. Oragahn]

Are the xenomorphs those of the "1st generation" which met human weapons for the first time in ALIENS, or the wicked ones from A:R and AVP, with the growth rates of AVP and the wandering facehuggers who love to take a walk?

I say these guys can give the Jedi a good run for their money, enough to prevent them from organizing properly against the YZ and the lurking Preds.
You already have 300 xenomorphs here, plus a whole collection of eggs and free-huggies. :)

[User1469]

Too many Jedi. Luke, Han, Leia, Kype and Corran would be enough with what the opposition has.

The Aliens are the toughest here. The Preds not so much since they aren't sneaking up on everyone.

The YV can likely match an uncloaked pred rather easily. Uncloaked is a different story.
The Commandos most likely don't make it all back, but once they figure out that Alien blood will kill you it should be easier. Though its unknown if lightsaber cuts won't cauterize and not allow for blood spray.

[mojo]

clearly they do, else arterial blood loss would kill the loser of pretty much every lightsaber battle ever shown in a movie. i suppose you could argue there might be something different about the composition of the aliens that would resist this, but unless it were the most amazing leap in evolutionary history specifically designed to stop jedi from cauterizing their wounds (which would seem a bit pointless since obviously it would make them more apt to die) i think we can assume it would cauterize the aliens just as well as it does anybody else.

[mojo]

what bugs me a little bit is that there are so MANY players in this game. i mean, you might as well throw in all the transformers, the x-men, frankenstein's monster, and my mom as well.

[mojo]

my mom wins, btw.

[mojo]

also, who the hell misspells yuuZhan?

[StarWarsStarTrek]

Um, the fact that Luke Skywalker is part of the Jedi team makes this a foregone conclusion.

[User1468]

Going to join the consensus that says that using Luke makes this a Jedi auto-win. why should he bring any allies at all? Maybe Jaina or Mara Jade. someone to watch his back.

[Admiral Breetai]

very important question..is the opening poster allowing predator EU? if so are these young bloods? elders? bad bloods or what ever the renegade preds are called or..friggen Ancients?

because the older the pred the more dangerous and broken they get in the EU

[Praeothmin]

Superman wins... :)