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Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Thu Jul 11, 2013 4:11 am
by Admiral Breetai
sonofccn wrote:@ Breetia

Thank you for the compliments and approval regarding Vi'retess. So at least I didn't make a total mockery of everyone's characters. ;)
You did him better than I do him sometimes, I take it he's a favorite of yours?
sonofccn wrote: Nice segment addition, a little "getting to know you" time with the dogs of War before they get dropped in the grinder. I espcially liked how Jackson knows what to do before a "drop", instead of goofing off he's getting nice and rested for when he punches a "god" in the face really hard. And if I haven't said it before Thanagar is a true son of Soth Thejas.
You Jackson so well I didn't want to risk butchering him but I thought also that like the other old timers you've got someone incredibly experienced and professional who knows what's coming.

Im'pec being a warrior more than a soldier is going to brawl, Yoda needs to get used to fighting in a younger body..the rest all somber and preparing for the Dawn

but I thought Jackson would do that, glad you liked it I really was nervous about messing his character up..again

sonofccn wrote: A question through. Is the Sarmiento by itself or part of a small task force? Asking because, if no one else wants it, I was thinking of having a short space battle scene when they reach the planet.
it's got four Defiant class vessels hidden in her Saucer section and 30 Delta flyer class shuttles...and you could in theory tow a few Akiras and Steam runners in her subspace field- to the extent that she can accidentally "yank" a few of 'em into slipstream with her in her wake

you could have a good sized fleet battle if you have say Maxwell and Thanagar or Krevin in a fleet of ships coming to them as back up..or go with just what she can "drag along with her"

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Thu Jul 11, 2013 3:13 pm
by Praeothmin
I thought I read that the Sarmiento was a Sovereign-Class, or at least I deduced this based on Kirkinger's reaction on never having been on a Sovereign...

How can it have 4 Defiant-class ships inside its saucer section?

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Thu Jul 11, 2013 6:25 pm
by Admiral Breetai
Praeothmin wrote:I thought I read that the Sarmiento was a Sovereign-Class, or at least I deduced this based on Kirkinger's reaction on never having been on a Sovereign...

How can it have 4 Defiant-class ships inside its saucer section?
She's a modified Soviet designed during the Dominion war to essentially be a mobile star base for fleet command and then later for colonizing

I originally had her as a hundred and change meters longer and wider but I envisioned her as twice to almost three times the size of a standard Sovie

Hence the industrial replicators and weaponry hyped up to an insane degree

Picture a UFP version of an SSD

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Thu Jul 11, 2013 11:57 pm
by Praeothmin
I picture, and I drool... :)

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Tue Jul 23, 2013 10:02 pm
by Praeothmin
Ok, it was slow at work, so I wrote a little chapter...
Hope you guys like it...

*************************************************

“You inhuman son of a bitch!” Picard yelled at the man sitting behind the desk, as he entered a lavish office located deep into the NERV complex in Buenos Aires, on Earth.
He knew the reputation of the man he was barging in on, knew how dangerous what he was doing was, how much it could affect his career, but Jean-Luc Picard cared not at all, for at that moment, the slayer of Borg, vanquisher of Remans, felt indignation he had not felt in ages, and he would be damned if he wasn’t going to let the man know what he thought about the situation.

The man, apparently deeply immersed in examination of a document on a PADD, barely lifted his eyes at Picard’s irruption.

“Ah, Captain Picard,” He said amiably, as greeting an old, friendly acquaintance, “to what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you here?” He asked in a nonchalant way which had the effect of increasing the other man’s agitation.

“You know damn well why I’m here, Gendo!” Picard told the man with anger in his rich voice.
“You had no right to give that order, and you know it.” He told the man still sitting behind his desk.

Gendo looked at Picard, perplexity on his face, as if he’d been presented with an indecipherable puzzle.

“According to the United Nations Star League, my position, one in the highest echelons of Command, does indeed allow me to do such a thing as to give orders to a mere Starfleet Captain, orders which I have the right to expect will be followed.” Gendo told the older man as if explaining things to a child.

Picard became livid at the man’s reply, his rage barely in check.

“I will do everything I can to make you regret ever giving such an order, and to ensure you are never again in a position to do so again, even if it is the last thing I do.” He told Gendo, his stare boring through the younger man, though if it had any effects on him, he didn’t show it.

“Captain,” Gendo began, “You know why I had to give the order.” He said in a dispassionate voice.
“I have extremely reliable sources that told me the enemy was, and still is, planning to attack the planet Zeta Gamma IV and use it as a supply base for their following attacks on Federation territory.
The order I gave you could save billions of innocent lives that would perish in a war if they have that base.
It is one of the most strategic locations inside United Nations Star League borders the enemy could have.” He told the aging Captain.

“So you would sacrifice over 600 million lives for a plan that could, not even an assurance it will, save, what, ten times more lives?” Picard told him almost derisively.
“If you are so concerned with saving lives, Gendo,” Picard said, once more ignoring the man’s title in obvious contempt, “Then perhaps you could have considered sending a task force to intercept the enemy fleet before they can reach the planet, and destroy them there.” He said.
“After all, we both know a Genesis torpedo will destroy everything within an AU after detonation, whether is it on a planet, or in space.” Picard told the man.
“Putting one aboard a shuttle launched at the enemy would destroy the enemy fleet and prevent the unnecessary and inhuman sacrifice of the planet’s population.” He finished.

“But that would let the enemy know we have information leaked to us, it would let them know with 100% certainty they have a mole in their higher echelons.” Gendo Ikari told Picard.

“Blowing up the planet with a Genesis device hidden in a power plant on its surface would also tell them that, to the cost of 600 million innocent lives.” Picard answered smugly, his expression letting Gendo know his explanation was devoid of reason and logic.

“Of course not,” Gendo replied gently, “Zeta Gamma IV possesses a secret Proto-matter production facility, of which the enemy has been aware for some time.
And as the Genesis torpedo uses Proto-matter, the explosion would simply look like there was an accident in that facility, thus killing the enemy fleet and protecting our source within the enemy ranks.”

“Proto-matter?” Picard almost yelled incredulously at Gendo.

“Why are you so surprised, Picard?” The man asked, this time foregoing the Captain’s title.
“You know well the power Proto-matter produces, far beyond M/AM reactions.
Starfleet needs this if it’s going to prevail against all its enemies.
They are too powerful for us to let some backwards morals and laws get in the way of strengthening ourselves.” Gendo said coldly, as if he was above those laws.

The Starfleet Captain couldn’t believe it.
The most illegal substance in the UNSL was being secretly produced by NERV on a remote world, and what was even worse was that the enemy knew of it.
He had often heard Gendo associated with highly irregular experiments or dealings within the UNSL, but he never imagined how far the man was willing to go to ensure what he felt was the UNSL’s security, never imagined how easily and callously he was willing to dispose of innocent lives to further his plans.

“These backwards morals, as you call them, are what allowed the United Nations Star League to become the beacon of humanity and good it is today,” Picard said sternly, having re-asserted his calm.
“It is these morals people look up to, these morals which have always allowed others to trust us, to elevate ourselves as a large community willing to help each other through adversity, which have helped forge alliances which last to this day.” The Captain added, as if lecturing a small boy who had done something wrong.
“Without these morals, the League would still be a small power in a vast interstellar sea, most likely grinded under the boots of petty tyrants, dissolved under the constant strain of power hungry mongrels tearing at its heart.” He added.
“People like you, it seems, willing to de everything to reach their goals, no matter what the cost… To others, of course, never to you.” Picard almost spat out.

“The problem with indignant people like you, Picard, always on the front lines, always nose-deep in the day to day affairs of the small people, is that it becomes easy for you to miss the greater picture in our fight for the League, and how little we count individually.” Gendo told Picard.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have things to do.” He added, finally getting up and moving towards the door as if he was leaving.

“The problem with people like you,” Picard countered as Gendo was leaving his office, “Is that you stand so far back from the front lines that it becomes easy to forget that the United Nations Star League we so dearly fight for is essentially all those individual people you so easily spit upon and conveniently forget.
It is easy to forget that without them, there would be no League, you arrogant, self-centered bastard.”

Gendo turned at those words, and looked Picard in the eyes.

“Never forget who you’re talking to, Picard, for I have many friends in high places.” He said with menace in his voice.

“So do I, Gendo, so do I!” Picard said with just as much gusto.

Gendo turned around and left then, making sure Picard could not see his smile.

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 2:09 am
by Khas
Um, some slight corrections.

The name of the organization that controls the Evas is NERV. And their headquarters are in Buenos Aires - at least in FPE. In canon Evangelion, they're in Tokyo-3.

And the secret committee Gendo meets with is called Seele (pronounced SAY-LAY). (It's name is the German word for "soul".)

And it's the UNSL - United Nations Star League - that governs humanity in FPE (which is the shortened way of writing "Fluid Power Evangelion".)

But other than that, good. :)

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Wed Jul 24, 2013 11:09 am
by Praeothmin
Corrections?

What corrections?

*These are not the mistakes you were looking for* :)

Seriously though, do you think I did Picard justice, or Gendo?

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 12:58 am
by Admiral Breetai
This seems to be first contact Picard...he's very angry

not that I have any problems with it

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 5:47 am
by Khas
Especially how Picard and Gendo are arguing over philosophies. Picard having the philosophy that one should always maintain the moral high ground, no matter what, while Gendo believes that the ends justify the means. Both have humanity's best interests at heart, but the methods they employ are VERY different.

But I also have to pity Picard. He has NO idea who he's going against. Any man who can play both Seele and Section 31 like puppets is no one to be fucked with.

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Fri Jul 26, 2013 8:59 pm
by Praeothmin
Well, Picard is angry because he's been ordered to sacrifice an entire world...One would think that someone of his sensibilities would be angry at that...

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in?

Posted: Tue Jul 30, 2013 6:51 pm
by sonofccn
Praeothmin wrote:Corrections?

What corrections?

*These are not the mistakes you were looking for* :)

Seriously though, do you think I did Picard justice, or Gendo?
I think you did them justice, yes. And as much as I think Picard is a starched shirt seeing him and Gendo togather really hammers home how much we all need him.

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in

Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2017 2:58 pm
by Admiral Breetai
Subbotaaroxy wrote:been looking around for some ST/SW fanfictions that arent pro wars...where the feds are a credible threat..and its decently written

well that and for the sake of guilty pleasure any pro trek stomp fics that arent god awful or if they are..hilariously bad

I find nothing...any place you guys can point me towards? any titles or links?

thanks
I'd recommend my own amateurish attempt, which I need to reinvest in. Though it isn't the Federation quite yet, its actually the Dominion invading the Galactic Empire and currently the wars ground down to a brutal stalemate and killed just under ten billion people.

Federation is going to show up, klingons are already there...it might be to your liking. Titled the Tides of history, you can find it in this very section.

Site Admins Yet Another Wormhole crossover is interesting as well.

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 3:02 pm
by sonofccn
Admiral Breetai wrote:
Subbotaaroxy wrote:been looking around for some ST/SW fanfictions that arent pro wars...where the feds are a credible threat..and its decently written

well that and for the sake of guilty pleasure any pro trek stomp fics that arent god awful or if they are..hilariously bad

I find nothing...any place you guys can point me towards? any titles or links?

thanks
I'd recommend my own amateurish attempt, which I need to reinvest in. Though it isn't the Federation quite yet, its actually the Dominion invading the Galactic Empire and currently the wars ground down to a brutal stalemate and killed just under ten billion people.

Federation is going to show up, klingons are already there...it might be to your liking. Titled the Tides of history, you can find it in this very section.

Site Admins Yet Another Wormhole crossover is interesting as well.
Wow dejavu. I knew that bot's message sounded familiar...just didn't click until now

-Respectfully, Sonofccn

Re: Which fanfic universe would you rather live in

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 5:53 pm
by Iscander
Wow dejavu. I knew that bot's message sounded familiar...just didn't click until now

-Respectfully, Sonofccn
They're learning