The way it works. Star trek vs star wars diffrent views.
Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 9:51 pm
This is a scenario run through from the separate points of view of a star wars fanboy, and a star trek fanboy. I will be posting more scenario's in a while. This is mean't to be funny, not offend anyone.
Scenario 1: The empire invades the federation.
Star wars fanboy:
The empire sends 25 000 ships to invade the federation and the deathstar after both buying maps from races such as the ferengi and sending massive waves of probes to map the galaxy. The federation begins to amass their pitiful fleet of ships to take on the star destroyers , while the death star is blowing up planets with glee. The federation signals for help from the klingons, cardassians, romulans or anyone else who has a fleet, but unfortunetly their all to scared shitless and ally with the empire. The fleet attacks the star destroyers but is no match for the massive firepower and speed of the star destroyers. The federation starships are barely able to scratch the star destroyers, let alone the death star and find them selves out gunned, out matched, and in a purely hopeless situation. star destroyers plow through the federations defenses blowing up planets and enslaving whole races, while yawning at the pure boredom of it.
While making their way through the delta quadrant, they encounter the borg but laugh at these so called "fearsome conquers" and laugh as the borg attempt to adapt to their superior fire power. Destroying the borg is so easy that Darth Vader has to cry himself to sleep because he has no Imperial officers to strangle for their stupidity or ineptness.
Meanwhile with the federation forces scattered, the deathstar easily makes its way to earth. Picard desperatly screams out.
"Q WE NEED YOU!" and he appears, but quickly gives Picard the finger and says "Dude, wtf! What makes you think i'd help you." then runs away laughing.
The death star closes in and destroy's earth in one spectacular blast. Trekkies everywhere commit massive suicide and star wars movies come out by the dozens to satisfy the warsies who are basking in the after glow of victory.
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Star trek fanboy:
The Empire sends 25 000 star destroyers and the death star to invade the federation. However no one will sell them maps, and their probes are easily noticed before hand, notifying the federation that someones invading. Without proper star maps the empire is unable to properly navigate our space until the probes complete their exploration. So they are forced to do tiny hops to their destination, negating their greater speed. The federation has gotten offers from all races in the alpha quadrant and they all amass in one single fleet. They are now ready to take the empire on. They meet in battle, and find that the star destroyers shields are so technologically inferior, that their weapons pass right through their shields, and their weapons so weak they do no damage. The federation makes quick work of many of the ships, causing the empire to retreat.
Meanwhile, the Empire has reached the delta quadrant and meets the borg. The borg quickly adapt to their weapons and begin assimilating the star destroyers, quickly reducing their fleet to nothing in the delta quadrant.
The empire tries sending its death star to destroy earth but, upon reaching it, the federation scans it and finds the exhaust port. A single shot from a photon torpedo into the exhaust port hits the reactor, and the death star explodes. Picard wonders how long it will take to get rid of the rest of those panzy ass star destroyers. Suddenly Q appears and says. "Why jean luc, i haven't done anything cause i knew you could take care of it. But those little things really shouldn't be your problem. Let me help." He then snaps his fingers and the empire ceases to be.
Star wars fans everywhere star bawwing about how its not fair, and can't be true. Trekkies jizz in their pants and continue to masturbate to deanna troi porn and play star trek online thinking its the best game ever.
Scenario 1: The empire invades the federation.
Star wars fanboy:
The empire sends 25 000 ships to invade the federation and the deathstar after both buying maps from races such as the ferengi and sending massive waves of probes to map the galaxy. The federation begins to amass their pitiful fleet of ships to take on the star destroyers , while the death star is blowing up planets with glee. The federation signals for help from the klingons, cardassians, romulans or anyone else who has a fleet, but unfortunetly their all to scared shitless and ally with the empire. The fleet attacks the star destroyers but is no match for the massive firepower and speed of the star destroyers. The federation starships are barely able to scratch the star destroyers, let alone the death star and find them selves out gunned, out matched, and in a purely hopeless situation. star destroyers plow through the federations defenses blowing up planets and enslaving whole races, while yawning at the pure boredom of it.
While making their way through the delta quadrant, they encounter the borg but laugh at these so called "fearsome conquers" and laugh as the borg attempt to adapt to their superior fire power. Destroying the borg is so easy that Darth Vader has to cry himself to sleep because he has no Imperial officers to strangle for their stupidity or ineptness.
Meanwhile with the federation forces scattered, the deathstar easily makes its way to earth. Picard desperatly screams out.
"Q WE NEED YOU!" and he appears, but quickly gives Picard the finger and says "Dude, wtf! What makes you think i'd help you." then runs away laughing.
The death star closes in and destroy's earth in one spectacular blast. Trekkies everywhere commit massive suicide and star wars movies come out by the dozens to satisfy the warsies who are basking in the after glow of victory.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Star trek fanboy:
The Empire sends 25 000 star destroyers and the death star to invade the federation. However no one will sell them maps, and their probes are easily noticed before hand, notifying the federation that someones invading. Without proper star maps the empire is unable to properly navigate our space until the probes complete their exploration. So they are forced to do tiny hops to their destination, negating their greater speed. The federation has gotten offers from all races in the alpha quadrant and they all amass in one single fleet. They are now ready to take the empire on. They meet in battle, and find that the star destroyers shields are so technologically inferior, that their weapons pass right through their shields, and their weapons so weak they do no damage. The federation makes quick work of many of the ships, causing the empire to retreat.
Meanwhile, the Empire has reached the delta quadrant and meets the borg. The borg quickly adapt to their weapons and begin assimilating the star destroyers, quickly reducing their fleet to nothing in the delta quadrant.
The empire tries sending its death star to destroy earth but, upon reaching it, the federation scans it and finds the exhaust port. A single shot from a photon torpedo into the exhaust port hits the reactor, and the death star explodes. Picard wonders how long it will take to get rid of the rest of those panzy ass star destroyers. Suddenly Q appears and says. "Why jean luc, i haven't done anything cause i knew you could take care of it. But those little things really shouldn't be your problem. Let me help." He then snaps his fingers and the empire ceases to be.
Star wars fans everywhere star bawwing about how its not fair, and can't be true. Trekkies jizz in their pants and continue to masturbate to deanna troi porn and play star trek online thinking its the best game ever.